Merry Christmas

As we grow older we begin to realize just how important family and friends are to our daily lives. We soon realize, that when all is said and done, they are the very ones that are there for us letting us know that they really do care and they really do love us.

So often we forget that every person, with their own personality, may not always do things the way we think it should be done. But, are we really any better…I don’t think so. I can’t help but remember what my aunt Mickie taught many of us, “Love them where they are, not where you want them to be.”

This Christmas season let us put aside our differences and just love each other.

Jesus said in John 13:34-35 "A new command I give you: Love one another as I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."

As I have said before - My Facebook is for cousins only. We are spread out all over the U.S. I am talking with cousins that I have never met personally. Cousins by marriage and cousins who were little kids that last time I saw them...and now they are grandparents. I especially love the pictures and I am getting to know my cousins through these pictures and postings.

I get lots and lots of good comments from the different ones that they also are communicating with people they really don't know...they just know that we are all related. What an exciting time this has been for me. I only pray that they will all continue getting to know each other after I have gone home to be with my savior.

There were nine children in the Joe/Jo Burnell Family...eight girls and one boy. One girl died when she was 18 and one is a nun in the Mercy order. So from seven of the Burnell children came 28 cousins with one thing in common - "lots more cousins."

The following "A Tribute to Cousins" is a glimpse of our family.

A Tribute To Cousins ~by Andy Rooney

Cousins vague bond more binding than friendship.

Some families are more serious about cousins than others. We never made much of cousins in our family. I can't even remember exactly how many I have. They were nowhere near as important in my life as uncles and aunts. You're more aware of cousins when you're young than you are later.
When I was little, I knew some of my cousins pretty well, but in our family, we treated cousins more like friends. If we liked them, we saw them. If we didn't like them, we hardly ever saw them.

One of the first questions I recall having about cousins is why boy cousins and girl cousins are both called just cousins.

It's as if uncles and aunts were both called by the same word.

Cousins are the only relatives, the word for whom does not distinguish gender. And, come to think of it, English is probably one of the few languages in which the word for boy cousin or girl cousin is the same. In French it's "cousin-cousin", in Spanish, "primo-prima." You always have them and even if 20 years go by without any contact, it's still possible to get together with a cousin and share stories about how Uncle Herbert drove his car through the garage door.

Cousins are the glue in the cracks that hold big families together.

Southerners make more of cousins than people from other parts of the country. In the South, everyone knows their second and third cousins. I hardly know what a second cousin is and I know darn well I couldn't give the definition of a third cousin or a cousin twice removed. Whatever it is, we didn't do third cousins in my family. Just plain cousins were enough to deal with. ("Kissing cousins," I understand.)

Strange things happen with cousins in relation to age.

If your mother has a brother 10 years older than she is, and he has children early in his marriage and your mother has you late, you can end up with a cousin 25 years older than you are. My cousin Bob was more like an uncle than a cousin to me because he was about 15 years older.

Living reminders.

Cousins are a great reminder of genes and inheritance. You can know a cousin for years and never give much thought to what he or she looks like and then one day the cousin will turn his head or pick up a glass or a shadow will fall across his forehead and, in a flash, you see a likeness.

There is something about the way the cousin holds his chin or something about the position of his thumb, that reminds you of your father or your mother or yourself. You see some minor gene you have in common and wonder what major genes you share.

There are so many things to be thankful for this past year (besides "life" itself) that I cannot possibly list them all, so I will just list a few.

Faith - I am thankful that God put it on my heart to be responsible for my future while dealing with cancer.
I was able to make sensible decisions about my treatment and my resting place when my time comes to go home.
I was able to make decisions about selling my condo and moving into a small apartment.
I was able to make decisions about paying off my bills and not leaving them for someone else to handle after I am gone.

Family - I am thankful for the opportunity that FB has given me to connect and reconnect with all of my cousins through pictures and postings. There are now 76 cousins, 3 nieces, 1 nephew and 1 aunt on my FB. I am so blessed.

Friends – I am thankful for my church family who have supported me both spiritually and sometimes financially (especially for my birthday) throughout the past year.
Rebecca who is always available to take me to appointments and cry with me when I need to cry.
Laurie who calls me almost every day and will be taking my cats when I can no longer care for them.

~

I walked a mile with Pleasure;

She chattered all the way;

She left me none the wiser

For all she had to say.

~

I walked a mile with Sorrow;

And ne'er a word said she;

But oh! The things I learned from her

When Sorrow walked with me.

~

I am thankful for the many, many prayers that have been sent and continue to be sent up to God on my behalf.

Happiness

I will remember that my happiness is not a thing but a process. It is the way in which I travel through the days ahead. Some of the travels will be easier, lighter, and more rewarding than others, but each day the journey is my own and I am its guide. ~Carol Staudacher~

“The Lord shall guide thee continuallly and satisfy thy soul.” Isaiah 58:11

Good news

There are so many people sick and so many different things going around with colds and flu, etc. I also have not escaped the illness and have had a sinus infection for about six weeks now. I have been very fortunate that I have not been running a fever so I was not worried that it would turn into the flu. My oncologist put me on an antibiotic which is finally working. He also ordered some blood work because I am totally drained and short of breath. There was the possibility that I might be anemic so he ordered a complete blood count along with a complete metabolic panel that includes tests for liver and kidneys. What a blessing - ALL test results are normal. Nothing was out of range.

It is hard not to worry - wondering if the cancer is progressing faster than I would like. So, I try to remember Matthew 6:27 "Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" I do pray that I am on my way to feeling better now.

As I continue on this journey.

“We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure.”
~Hebrews 6:19a (NIV)

As my cousin pointed out on her husband's blog, "Sometimes we sugar-coat what is really going on in our lives - those of us with cancer." She is correct, sometimes we do. It is not always easy to face the daily realities of our future when cancer is always at the forefront of our minds. We often do not realize how it affects, not just ourselves, but all those that we love. I found this Hospice web site that has put into words some of my true feelings. I did not copy all of it just those parts that spoke to me.

Acknowledge You Are Dying
Acknowledging you are dying is the first step to living the rest of your life. If the onset of your illness was sudden or unexpected, you will likely feel shock and numbness at first. This is a natural and necessary response to painful news.

You can only cope with this new reality in doses. You will first come to understand it with your head, and only over time will you come to understand it with your heart.

To acknowledge you are dying is to let go of the future. It is to live only in the present. There is no easy way to do this, and you will probably struggle with this task every day until you die. Know that if you work at acknowledging the reality of your coming death, however, instead of denying it, you will open your heart and mind to the possibility of a new, rich way of living.

Accept Your Response to the Illness
Each person responds to news of terminal illness in his or her unique way. You, too, will have your own response, be it fear, excitement, anger, loss, grief, denial, hope or any combination of emotions.

Becoming aware of how you respond right now is to discover how you will live with your terminal illness. Don’t let others prescribe how you feel; find people who encourage you to teach them how you feel. After all, there is no right or wrong way for you to think and feel.

Respect Your Own Need For Talk, For Silence
You may find that you don’t want to talk about your illness at all. Or you may find that you want to talk about it with some people, but not with others. In general, open and honest communications is a good idea. When you make your thoughts and feelings known, you are more likely to receive the kind of care and companionship you feel will be most helpful to you.

But if you don’t want to talk about your illness, don’t force yourself. Perhaps you will be able to open up more later on, after you have lived with the reality of your illness for a time.

Be an Active Participant in Your Medical Care
Many people are taught as “patients” to be passive recipients of the care provided by medical experts. But don’t forget this - this is your body; your life. Don’t fail to ask questions that are important to your emotional and physical well-being out of fear that you will be “taking up someone’s time.”

Learn about your illness. Visit your local library and consult the medical reference books. Request information from educational associations, such as the National Cancer Institute or the American Heart Association. Ask your doctor, nurses and other caregivers whenever you have a question.

If you educate yourself about the illness and its probable course, you will better understand what is happening to you. You will be better equipped to advocate for personalized, compassionate care. You may not be in control of your illness, but you can and should be in control of your care.

Be Tolerant of Your Physical and Emotional Limits
Your illness will almost surely leave you feeling fatigued. Your ability to think clearly and make decisions may be impaired. And your low energy level may naturally slow you down. Respect what your body and mind are telling you. Nurture yourself. Get enough rest. Eat balanced meals. Lighten your schedule as much as possible.

Source: https://hospicenet.org/html/help_yourself.html

'Stop and smell the roses'

I would rather have one rose and a kind word from a friend while I'm here than a whole truck load when I'm gone

Thank You Jolene, you are a dear friend

God Are You Real?

The child whispered, "God, speak to me."
A meadowlark sang, but the child did not hear.
So the child yelled, "God, speak to me!"
And thunder rolled across the sky, but the child did not listen.

The child looked around and said, "God let me see you."
A star shone brightly, but the child did not notice
And the child shouted, "God show me a miracle!"
And a life was born, but the child did not know.

So the child cried out in despair,
"Touch me God, and let me know you are here!"
Whereupon God reached down and touched the child.
But the child brushed the butterfly away and walked away unknowingly.

Author Unknown